Let's call this one euphoria

There's a place where I'm at right now that's hard to describe.
It's that brand new feeling.
The kind of place that's familiar yet completely unfamiliar.
It's like staying up till morning yet feeling like you've slept all night.
Or being homesick for a place you've never been before.
Like hating something your whole life and then suddenly realizing
You love it more than anything, and always have.
Like being best friends with a complete stranger.
It's infantile in a sense. Completely innocent.
Illogically reasonable, or unreasonably logical.
Like watching something incapable of choice or emotion
Give its life so that someone else may live.
I like this place. It's a natural high.
Like some existential fear has been lifted from me.
I could get comfortable here.
Yet, I wonder,
Will I tear it apart like I tend to do with everything else?
Or will this time finally be different?
For the first time, or maybe the last time... the only time...
I am alive, and I am grateful; everything is different now,
Yet absolutely nothing has changed.