12/10/08
LOLZ
8/28/08
YOU MAKE ME SICK
My head starts spinning,
My heart starts pounding
And my hands start sweating.
My stomach turns circles
And tangles up in knots.
I clench my fist and grit my teeth,
Thinking about the way you look at me.
I just want you to notice me,
And love me as much as I love you.
Because I do.
But my eyes are watering,
And I feel queasy.
You see, you make me sick.
Sick to my stomach.
8/20/08
Deep down, we're all just socialists.
Looking back at my past, I realize I have lived most of my life by that mindset. I know people, I know animals. People are terrible and dark by nature. Animals are pure and simple. So on the scales the animals won in my mind. What truly amazes me is this was locked tightly in my subconscious until recently. People always hinted that I thought that way, but I never saw it until months ago. What I find even more comical is that fascists and communists despise each other by nature. But the one NAZI I have come across in my travels I did not seem to have a problem with. What's even more ridiculous is that he was my friend until he found out I was a commie. Then he stopped talking to me. Humans are so ridiculous it's funny. So I, a communist, hold very much the same mindset as Hitler, a fascist. It's beautiful and absurd. And honestly that isn't the only thing that ties us mentally. I know this because I have thought some of the same things I later learned Germany committed. I won't even lie about it. Once people are old, morbidly obese, or incapacitated, they should be put to rest. There are many other things we have shared. Do you call me insane? That's fine. I already know I'm mentally fucked lol. But I'll put money on it that I'm more intelligent/creative/mentally powerful than you are or will ever be. But no one's comparing here and there's no need for the bravado so please pardon my little show of human nature lol. Anyways my point is: I stopped letting other people influence my life, and at that point I ceased hating humanity. So all I have to say is: When I knew people, I preferred dogs.
8/14/08
waking up
I do nothing but sit here, thinking; sleeping.
But a warm light blankets my face and shakes me from sadness.
Anger and morose are beyond me now,
And I don't surrender myself to senseless anger.
Seeing my legs dangling and my feet waving,
The children of destruction taunt me as they gather their arms
And march off to war,
Knowing they will put their elders six feet under.
Their militia passes by around sunset
Never giving a passing glance.
I've grown weary of this time, and I do not want to see
Another innocent bird shot out of the sky.
So, with the timing perfect, I shall fall to my death.
The fall will not kill me, for the wall is not high.
And the men shall not harm me, for I am their ally.
But in this new warring society, owned by these radicals
Who once rallied for freedom and harmony
There is no longer a chance for peace.
8/13/08
Guess who
Of my people, and the way those in charge take care of them.
I'm ashamed of the way we handle what are supposed to be peaceful international affairs.
I'm tired of the way our public servants waltz around,
Becoming a gestapo. And I'm sorry to see we are becoming a fascist nation.
And I know that those of you who have already fallen,
Those who have never realized that they have a mind,
Those reading this who falsely believe they have served me;
You scoff at me as you read this.
You think to yourself that I must hate this beautiful country we live in,
Because that is the only explanation as to why anyone would think these things;
Why anyone would think for themselves.
Let me introduce myself.
I AM AMERICA.
I AM THE AMERICAN PEOPLE, THE FOREFATHERS, THE SETTLERS, THE PROMISED LAND.
Sufficed to say, things weren't right from the beginning.
But our supposed freedoms are gone, and no longer are we a symbol of hope.
And I am guilty of what the blind see as a crime.
I smile when I see a flag flown upside-down,
Because something IS wrong here, and we DO need immediate assistance.
If you know me, you know I reside in the red, white, and blue.
But for now, I think I'm going to go somewhere else.
If you want to find freedom, don't look for me in the stars and stripes.
I will stay within those three colors;
You can still find me in France, England, or a myriad of other places;
But you must educate yourself to find me.
So until things clear up at home, you must look for me elsewhere.
I AM AMERICA.
I AM THE AMERICAN PEOPLE, THE FOREFATHERS, THE SETTLERS, THE PROMISED LAND.
I AM FREEDOM. I AM PEACE.
8/12/08
let me ask you
Rathe
8/5/08
if you are curious about my short stories
http://earnyourstripes-ak.blogspot.com/
ah that beautiful thing called uncertainty
7/26/08
Let's call this one euphoria
It's that brand new feeling.
The kind of place that's familiar yet completely unfamiliar.
It's like staying up till morning yet feeling like you've slept all night.
Or being homesick for a place you've never been before.
Like hating something your whole life and then suddenly realizing
You love it more than anything, and always have.
Like being best friends with a complete stranger.
It's infantile in a sense. Completely innocent.
Illogically reasonable, or unreasonably logical.
Like watching something incapable of choice or emotion
Give its life so that someone else may live.
I like this place. It's a natural high.
Like some existential fear has been lifted from me.
I could get comfortable here.
Yet, I wonder,
Will I tear it apart like I tend to do with everything else?
Or will this time finally be different?
For the first time, or maybe the last time... the only time...
I am alive, and I am grateful; everything is different now,
Yet absolutely nothing has changed.
7/22/08
DO YOU REALIZE??
so my great great grandpa died today. I'm the only person who isn't sad. I mean, it sucks that he died but he was almost 100 years old and on top of that he's had two serious strokes this year. It was his time, we should be happy he was ever with us, and we should be happy that he has escaped the pain of being a man. All of us will die. I will die, you will die, Paris Hilton will die. Robin Williams, Bill Murray, Serj Tankian, Daron Malakian, John Dolmayan, Shavo Odadjian, Tom Morello, Josh Carroll, Matt Boyden, The Rev, Cassey Guillory, My future daughter, her mother, my cats, your cats, your dogs, Satan, Santa Claus, Barack Obama, Bill and Hillary Clinton, Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake, Jessica Simpson, the Coen brothers, and George Clooney will all die someday. What makes you any different? IF JESUS, ANNA NICOLE SMITH, HEATH LEDGER, ALBERT EINSEIN, ALBERT HOFFMAN, ABBIE HOFFMAN, JIM MORRISON, ELVIS PRESLEY, JOHN LENNON, JFK, AND ESTELLE GETTY CAN DIE, SO CAN YOU! Don't fear it, embrace it! (not in the way an emo kid does, but in the way someone who can honestly say they lived a full life could do) So if someone dies, don't let it catch you off guard. Sure, it's okay to be sad and miss that person, but don't completely lose it. Expand yourself and realize anyone can die at anytime. Be grateful for the time spent with that person, and be happy that they don't hurt anymore. Peace and love. -AK.
7/19/08
All We Have Is Now
But logic broke as he appeared, he spoke about the future.
"We're not gonna make it" he explained how the end will come.
You and me were never meant to be part of the future.
All we have is now. All we've ever had is now.
I noticed that he had a watch and hat that looked familiar.
He was me, from a dimension torn free of the future.
"We're not gonna make it" he explained how the end will come.
You and me were never meant to be part of the future.
All we have is now. All we've ever had is now.
It Overtakes Me...
These words brought upon by The Flaming Lips made me realize something tonight... My entire life I've felt trapped.. almost as if I were in a giant snowglobe or a massive bubble, floating helplessly through everything... left to watch the world go by. I always wondered what made me feel this way, and why every time I look up at the sky, I feel trapped in a glass sphere. It occurred to me tonight that maybe the reason I feel this way is because I AM TRAPPED IN A GIANT SPHERE. WE ALL ARE. I can't believe it never hit me before. Now the only problem is how to escape this dilemma..... hmmm...........
Somewhere at this very moment, Dick Cheney is wiping his semen off the back of a deaf asian child while thinking this to himself...
....well Mr. Corrupt Capitalist Corporate Pig, I honestly don't know what on earth possessed me to try and show you what I think should humanity should be. You're right. Who the hell do I think I am. Oh yeah, that's right. I'm pretty sure I'm a Communist "hippie". Peace and love to all you capitalists out there. -AK.
4/15/08
fagotism
the bronx
Believe me, it's a pattern of distrust that brings the fellow man
together to fight on a common ground for a common goal in a common land.
Evolving into ice, each and every one of us sees a promised land broken
A piece of a peaceful revenue, followed by the perforated edges of discomfort
Risen to find nothing more than broken eggshells, bloody fetus, home abandoned.
Live, Lie, Die trying.
Seek the fallow valley, grab the sullen ground.
Round, round, round, circumnavigating.
Dead leaves broken wrist carpal autumn evening.
Radiation radiating from the end point radius.
Comatose, lying broken and bruised
Staring blankly at a sheet of paper
In aisle three of the local shopping center.
Eyes on the reverse end of a nanosecond shutter
Blinking lights, door left wide open
Down inner city pressing days of Armageddon.
Meteorite red-lights, taxi cabs a go-go.
Left hand shaking, front lobe throbbing
Eraser left shaving.
This lead left broken
At the end of my creation
The tool is useless now.
Overcoming convulsive rage.
Damn. I spilled my coffee.
4/14/08
women
P.S. this bulletin does not simply apply to females.
sick
wake up people
4/4/08
Life and the CCCP
Life is so uncertain. I don't understand why people want to waste their lives away just to have money when they're old. I NEVER WANT TO BE OLD. Why would someone work every day for forty years just to have enough money to take a cruise and then sit in their house for twenty years, alone because they were stupid enough to let their children make the same mistakes they did?! WHY?! Why do people allow themselves to be subdued by the drugs (whether illegal or prescription) that the government distributes to keep them distracted from the daily serving of bullshit that the media shoves down our throats. FUCK YOU AMERICA! I refuse to fall for your tricks. The day you break me and I agree to spend my best years breaking my back for your profit and your profit alone is the day that I will be found happily deceased. MY FRIENDS, MY FAMILY: DO NOT ALLOW THIS CORRUPT CAPITALISTIC CORPORATE PRISON [CCCP] WHICH IS AMERICA TO SUBDUE YOU. DO NOT ALLOW IT TO TELL YOU YOU NEED TO WORK TO BE HAPPY. DO NOT LET IT MAKE YOU THINK YOU WILL BE POOR AND WORTHLESS IF YOU DON'T "MAKE SOMETHING OF YOURSELF". GET OUT THERE AND CONQUER YOUR DREAMS. TRULY MAKE SOMETHING OF YOUR LIFE, NOT JUST MONEY IN A RETIREMENT HOME. ALL THOSE DREAMS YOU EVER THOUGHT OF DOING? DO THEM! NOW! OPEN YOUR EYES PEOPLE. IN THE WORDS OF MY BEST FRIEND- Remember there is a world out there, and one day we'll own it. - OWN THIS WORLD PEOPLE, DO NOT LET SOMEONE YOU DID NOT APPOINT OWN YOU. I leave you with these words from Serj Tankian and myself.- "If I can control your mind, I can control your will. If I can control your will, I can control your desires. If I can control your desires, I can control your destiny."- YOU MUST SCREAM WHAT OTHERS ONLY DARE TO WHISPER. OPEN YOUR EYES, OPEN YOUR MOUTH, CLOSE YOUR HAND AND MAKE A FIST! They are poisoning our water. Learn what you can. Take control of your life, and escape. I love you all. Thank you for taking the time to let me inform you.